I have been 40 for just over a week, and I feel I can now look at this supposed monumental birthday with some objectivity. Really, I wasn't very worked up about it to begin with. At the turn of each decade (which for me coincides with the whole world starting a new decade - being born in a year ending in zero will do that) so far, I have felt like I wanted to be in the previous decade's age for just a little longer. Maybe decades could last 15 years?? I distinctly remember turning 10, have vaguer memories of turning 20 (21 is more momentous at that point), and was quite pregnant with Greyson when I turned 30. So for me, the 20s represented my "free" time as an adult, and the 30s were my young parenthood years (when I feel I aged 20 years just due to lack of sleep and exposure to whining). My doctor said she really enjoyed her 40s, when the stress of raising small children and building a career were done and things got more fun. I can already see that, especially since I will finally be done with all my schooling and training and be able to feel like a true adult in my field.
Since the life expectancy of an American Caucasian female is now 80.1, in statistical terms, I have lived half my life now. I know many people make some sort of bucket list of things they want to do by a certain time (often by 40, or they make them when they turn 40), but I don't have a desire do that so formally. I have, however, been thinking about the things I used to think I would have done by now and have reassessed whether or not I 1) still want to do them, or 2) realistically could do them. Here are the big ones, and the verdicts:
1) Learn to fly a plane.
I've always held this in the back of my mind, and I could have arranged to learn fairly easily at many times. However, I tend to get motion-sick on small planes, and what I really wanted to do was fly a jet (really, just do the take-off) without having to go through the training on a small plane. So I've quite happily given this up and instead try to enjoy every time I get to ride in a jet (and quietly pretend I'm actually flying it).
2) Learn to paraglide.
This one's pretty similar to the first, and I was reminded of it when we saw paragliders in Hawaii in October. I still would actually like to do this, but I'd be fine if I never get to. I just hope that if the opportunity arises, I will take the chance and do it.
3) Visit all 50 states.
I've already been in 35, so this is still high on the list of manageable achievements. The aforementioned Hawaii trip made it way more likely that I'll accomplish this, since now only Alaska has any serious barriers to my visiting it. One slight problem is that although most I haven't visited are in specific geographic regions (extreme southwest and northeast), there are a few in the middle of the country that I managed to skirt and don't see making a special trip just to visit (Nebraska, Oklahoma, and North Dakota, to be exact).
4) Bungee jump.
OK, I came up with this when bungee jumping first became popular, and before I had kids, and I can safely say I no longer have an interest in this.
5) Compete in the Olympics.
Also gave this up when I realized I didn't have either the talent or the dedication to be a contender in any of the sports, summer or winter. And now that I'm watching the winter ones, I realize that almost none of the competitors are even near the age of 40, and those who are are referred to as "seasoned" or "veterans". Good for Dana Torres - I'm out.
6) Become a concert pianist.
See #5.
7) Visit lots of countries.
Slightly less doable than the 50 states one, and a bit less specific, but still high on my list. Dan and I recently made an actual list of where we'd each, individually and together, like to visit outside the US. It turns out, we're both more interested in first world countries and amenities, so that should make it easier to accomplish as we get older. Highest on the list are Belgium, Germany, and areas where our families came from to do some genealogy research (Lithuania for me, Hungary/Slovakia for him). I'd also like to visit some South American countries, specifically to see Incan ruins and the Amazon, and we'd both like to go to Thailand and Korea just to eat the food.
Mostly, I'm right where I thought I would be at this age, so I'm just trying to be grateful. My boys made me cards and gave me hugs and kisses, and those truly were the best gifts. I never believed my mom when she would tell us that's all she wanted, but now I know. And I really only have one complaint. Is it too much to ask that the acne stop when the gray hairs appear??
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